Give Me an Experience
by Alphonseelric22
Summary: Ed finally goes after something for himself and even he can't argue with the result.
1. Chapter 1

Had it really been two years? Two years since all that bullshit. Two years had passed and this place still didn't feel foreign. He'd resigned from the military after all of the shit of the promised day had happened. No sense in being a state alchemist when he couldn't do alchemy anymore and besides, he'd just been using the military as a means to an end. It was no skin off his back to walk away from it.

He couldn't say the same of the people though. Even though Ed had hated being one of the lapdogs for the state, he'd met so many people here that it was hard to just stay away. As he walked into the office he was greeted with smiles, pats on the back, and the all around tomfoolery that was ever present. Some things just didn't change.

"Didn't think we'd see you again any time soon, boss," Havoc said, cigarette between his teeth as he grinned.

"Oh come on. Ed wouldn't just forget us," Fuery said, gently pushing Havoc's shoulder.

"He would if he was held up by a certain mechanic," Breda said with a snicker. Ed just showed him his middle finger.

"Edward's personal life is none of our business," Falman said, ever one for propriety.

There was the sound of a throat clearing and all of the men immediately stiffened in their seats.

"Boys, there is no need to tease him. It's good to see you again, Ed," Riza said, never looking up from her work.

Ed smiled. "It's nice to see you too, ma'am. Where's-"

"Same place as always, pretending to work at his desk."

That was damn scary. She always seemed to know what he was thinking and most of the time it was before even he knew. Riza Hawkeye terrified him sometimes.

Ed said his thanks and waved to the snickering idiots at the table as he went to the inner office and stepped inside. There was soft snoring and Ed just snorted and grinned.

"Slacking off again, bastard?"

Roy blinked his eyes open and stared over at Ed. It was quiet for a moment as Roy's brain kicked back on from its sleepy haze. "You've gotten taller."

"Damn right I did!" Ed said, puffing out his chest and grinning. He walked over to the leather sofa, still the same one that had been here all these years, and plopped down on it. "So, how's everything goin?"

Roy just blinked at him again for a few moments. "I must be dreaming. Edward Elric and I do not have civil conversations."

"Ah, fuck you, asshole."

Roy smirked. "There's the brat I know. What brings you here, Ed?"

Ed sprawled himself out on the couch, arms behind his head and one leg propped up on the coffee table. "Just came by to see how you guys are doing."

He heard Roy chuckle and Ed frowned. "That's an awfully long trip just to say hi, Ed."

"You know, you're still such a bastard. Can't a guy jump on a train for a couple of days to come say hi?"

Roy was laughing a bit now and that was starting to piss Ed off. "Even you wouldn't waste that much time for something so trivial. Why are you really here?"

Damn him. Fucker was always one step ahead of him wasn't he? "Got some stuff I wanted to talk to you about," he said, scratching his cheek and staring away from Roy. The wall had suddenly become very interesting.

"Oh?" Ed heard shuffling and then footsteps and Roy was sitting on the couch opposite him.

Ed swallowed, trying to get rid of the lump in his throat. Fuck, how was he supposed to talk about this without sounding like a complete fucking idiot? No, he was not a goddamn coward and he was going to do this. He turned his head to face Roy and sat forward.

"Yeah. Got a some shit I wanna say and you better not fucking laugh, asshole."

Roy smiled and Ed felt his eyebrow twitch in annoyance. Damn bastard. "Go right ahead. I'm listening."

Okay, just get this shit out. "Back when all that shit was happening, the shit with father and the homunculi, even though we are all pretty busy I still had time to think about some things. A lot of things actually." Ed stopped speaking for a moment, scratching the back of his head. "Me and Al, we never had a normal life and there were things we didn't get to do when were teenagers, stuff we didn't get to experience."

"Your life was rather unorthodox compared to that of others your age. You can hardly be blamed for missing out on stuff, Ed."

Ed made sure he looked directly at Mustang now. "I thought a lot about... about dating and..." He swallowed hard again. "And sex."

Roy was back to blinking at him again. At least he wasn't laughing. Ed could hear his heart thundering in his ears but he refused to back down. He'd gone for so long ignoring his own needs because he had to (Al said differently), because there was so much at stake, and he'd had too much to do. Now, everything was done, everything was taken care of. Al was back in the flesh, Amestris was saved, and Ed no longer had to worry. He had all the time in the world to pursue what he wanted for himself.

"What are you getting at?" Roy asked and his voice sounded kind of strained.

Ed stood from the couch and walked around the table, stopping in front of a very surprised Roy Mustang and leaning down, hands planted on either side of his head against the back of the couch. Ed licked his lips before he spoke.

"There's... there's something that I want and I want it for me and now I'm not too busy to go after it."

Roy stared up at Ed. Ed stared down at Roy. Everything was silent save for the thumping in their chests and their breathing and before Ed could back down he leaned forward and put his lips on Roy's.

Ed gasped and then groaned as he was pulled down, deft fingers pulling the tie from his hair and letting it fall around his shoulders and frame his face. His chest was pressed against one more muscled than his own while Roy's finger cupped the back of his head and his teeth nipped at Ed's lower lip. The sensations were overwhelming and Ed was drowning in all of it, grinding against Roy before he even knew what he was doing and soon both men were nothing more than a tangle of limbs on the sofa.

Ed might have been horny as hell but he wasn't stupid. This was still the office and Mustang's team was on the other side of the unlocked door and there was no way he was getting fucked on a couch in Central headquarters. He pulled back, panting slightly, and grinned.

Roy no longer looked as surprised as he had before but it was still evident that he had not been expecting this turn of events and he wasn't sure just where it was leading. Roy's fingers were still in his hair, massaging his scalp in all the right places when he broke the silence.

"Tell me what you want, Edward."

"I want to see if all those damn rumors are true, if you're as good as they say you are. I want you to give me an experience like no fucking other," he said, licking his lips while his gaze briefly flicked down to Roy's mouth.

"An experience..." Roy was still toying with his hair as they fell silent again for a few moments. "I can do that, but not here."

Ed shook his head in agreement. "No, not here. Your place?"

Roy nodded, shifting on the sofa. "Tonight?" Ed nodded and then had to stifle a groan as he was pulled down for another searing kiss. He was going to have a hell of time walking after this.

After a few breathless moments of lips and teeth and tongues, Ed stood and straightened out his shirt and fixed his hair back up into a ponytail. Roy stood as well, moving to his desk to quickly write something on a small slip of paper and then his hand was out and Ed was taking the note.

"I'm done here about eight," Roy said, eyes glued to Ed.

Ed nodded and slipped the paper with the address on it into his pocket. "See you then, General."

–

Ed fidgeted in front of the mirror. This was so fucking stupid. What did it matter how his hair looked or what he wore? If things went how he wanted them to, and if earlier was any indicator they would, he wouldn't be dressed for long and his hair would be messed up! Ed growled in frustration. Fuck it! He'd just put it in the damn ponytail and then he'd wear that button down that Al had made him get and some slacks and his boots. No reason he had to look too damn fancy.

Ed got dressed, fought with his hair a little more until the ponytail sat just right, and then finally left the hotel. He fingered the paper in his pocket nervously as he made his way down the darkening streets of Central. Past the park, toward the shops, and to the left. He let his legs carry him even thought it felt like he wasn't moving an inch. Why was he so damn nervous? He was the one who asked for this and dammit he wanted it!

He was not running away from this. He was tired of running and he started this and he was damn well going to see it through. He had no reason to deny himself now and dammit it was about time he did something for himself. Ed figured he was allowed to be selfish now.

He stopped at the bottom of the steps, staring up at the apartment. He'd honestly expected Mustang to have some big ass house that was just as flamboyant as the Flame Alchemist himself. From the outside, it looked pretty plain and normal and that was weird because Mustang wasn't a plain and normal kind of guy or at least he'd never struck Ed as one. There was a glow coming from one of the windows and Ed swallowed hard.

It was now or never.

He walked up the couple of steps and knocked on the door, his stomach in knots as he heard the footsteps approaching.

Roy was smiling when he answered the door and that irritated Ed even though it shouldn't because Roy looked good when he smiled but it still bugged the fuck out of him. He frowned and one of Roy's eyebrows went up and damn that looked good too but it also annoyed him.

"I didn't think you were going to show up."

Ed pushed past him and went to the living room, sitting down on the sofa like he belonged there. Roy just chuckled and closed the door then followed him and stood by the couch. Ed felt his cheeks heat up a bit because was kind of staring at him then and that made him even more nervous but it was nice.

"Are you hungry?"

Ed perked up instantly. "Hell yeah!"

Roy just smiled at him then walked to the kitchen. Ed waited a minute before following him because he was not going to look like some fucking puppy just following at Mustang's heels. He was Edward Elric and even though he wanted this he was going to fucking act like it was no big deal because that was just who he was. He sat at the table and he almost drooled but caught himself before he could.

There was pasta and rolls and some other food that made Ed's stomach growl just from the smell. Ed didn't even thank him before he began piling food on his plate and stuffing his face. Okay, points in his favor because the food was fucking awesome and Roy had thought to feed him so this was already going pretty damn well.

They ate, neither saying much (Ed was too busy inhaling his food at dangerous speeds) and when they finished Roy cleared the table and Ed returned to the sofa, plopping down in contentment. "Damn, that was some good food."

Ed heard him before he saw him and then he was there in front of him and Ed's heart jumped up into his throat because Roy was leaning down but his lips didn't go to Ed's. He shivered at the breath fanning over the side of his face, warm in his ear as Roy spoke.

"Shall we take this somewhere a little more... private?" he husked.

Ed just nodded and Roy took his hand and was leading him upstairs. This was it wasn't it? He was finally going to see what those women came back for time and time again, what he had been curious about since he was no more than fifteen years old. His chest tightened and his throat got dry and he hadn't even noticed they'd made it to the room until the door closed with a soft click and Ed was sitting on the bed.

Roy slowly made his way over to him, placing his hands on either side of Ed and leaning forward, his face mere inches from Ed's. Ed licked his lips and he saw Roy's eyes dart down to them briefly and, as nervous as he was, Ed grinned.

"What's the matter? You nervous?" he asked, even though truthfully his heart was pounding an erratic rhythm in his chest at the moment.

Roy pressed forward and Ed leaned back a bit and he was almost laying down on the bed now. Roy smirked, one of his hands moving to Ed's hip. "Not in the least. You said you wanted an experience and I intend to give you just that."

Ed was pressed down on the bed now, Roy over him and Roy's lips on his. His hand massaged Ed's hip and that felt kind of odd but it felt good too. Roy's free hand was releasing Ed's hair from the ponytail Ed had put in and then rubbing his head and Roy's tongue was in his mouth and Ed groaned because there was so much at once and it all felt so damn good.

Roy's mouth was moving now and so were the fingers on Ed's hip. Ed squirmed a bit as kisses were peppered along his jawline and then down to his throat while calloused fingers slid up his shirt and over his abdomen. Roy's teeth joined his lips in their quest for flesh and Ed groaned, moving his head to give Roy more neck to lick and suck and nibble. His fingers were moving steadily upward, undoing the buttons on the white shirt as they caressed his skin and then they were dancing over his nipple now.

"You know," Roy whispered, tongue darting out to taste Ed's ear and that made Ed groan too, "you look good in a button down."

"Oh yeah?" Ed replied, his left hand moving under the hem of Roy's shirt to hold Roy's side in a bruising grip.

Roy hmmed softly against Ed's throat as he moved toward his collarbone. "I'm sure you'll look much better out of it."

Ed's hips jerked upward and Roy gently pushed them back down, his hand going back to open the last button and push the shirt open. Ed's chest was bared now and his cheeks flushed when Roy pushed back to stare down at him. The damn bastard had Ed's shirt open and he was still dressed. Ed would not be outdone and so he pushed himself up a bit, ripping open Mustang's shirt and grinning as buttons popped off and flew to floor, the shirt following soon after.

"I liked that shirt," Roy said but any other words died on his lips and Ed grinned around the nipple in his mouth. That sure shut the bastard up.

Ed watched as Roy's eyes narrowed before he shoved Ed back down to the bed and took Ed's nipple between his teeth and gently nipped and licked. Ed's hips bucked again but this time Roy didn't press them down. Feeling a bit more daring, Ed did it again but this time both of them groaned and then Ed was grinning because the bastard was already hard so Ed kept doing it, grinding against Roy's erection with his own and holy shit that felt really good and when it was starting to feel even better Roy held down Ed's hips with both his hands and Ed frowned at him.

"The fuck is your problem? Why'd you stop me?"

Roy said nothing but leaned down and completely removed Ed's shirt, tossing it so it could join his own, and then his hands slid lower and all of Ed's blood was going south because Roy's fingers were on his belt and he soon heard the clinking sound of the belt hitting the floor. He tried to thrust his hips up again but Roy kept them down firmly and that was starting to really piss Ed off.

"Let me go, asshole!"

"If I let you go you're going to grind it all out before we even get to the really good stuff."

The button on his slacks was open now and the zipper was sliding down and Ed was panting because he was so fucking hard and Roy was taking off his pants now. They brushed against his straining erection as they were pulled down and that hurt a little and fuck why was Mustang going so damn slow?!

Roy had stopped pulling his pants down and had moved his head away from where it had been dangerously close to Ed's cock and Ed wanted to pull his fucking hair out until he felt his boots come off and then his socks after that. His pants soon joined and he was now in nothing but his boxers, face bright red and his stomach doing weird flips.

Roy stood up and Ed frowned because why was he standing up when he could be on top of Ed and kissing Ed and then sucking Ed's dick? Ed almost growled until he saw Roy's hands go down to his own pants and loosen the button. Ed couldn't tear his eyes away as Roy slowly stripped himself of his pants and Ed went truly crimson then because _Roy Mustang was not wearing any underwear._

Mustang was chuckling and Ed was seconds from shoving automail toes far up the man's ass. Two could play this game. Ed hooked his fingers in his boxers and yanked them down, tossing them to the floor and then he grinned as Roy just stared down at him. Ha! _'Take that you son of a bitch.' _

Ed only felt victorious for a short time because now he was naked and Roy was just staring down at him like he was going to eat him. Ed feared he was going to do just that as he lowered himself over Ed and smirked but then there was something wrapping around his cock and now Ed _really _wanted to move his hips.

The older man kept one hand planted firmly on one of Ed's hips as the other slowly dragged up his length, grip loose and teasing. Even so, Ed's nerves fired to life and he moaned, long and loud, trying his hardest to thrust upwards. Roy stroked again and Ed's heels, both metal and flesh, dug into the bed but it still wasn't enough because his grip was too loose and he was going too fucking slow.

Ed slammed his head down against the bed. "Stop being a fucking tease, Mustang!"

Roy laughed and Ed growled. "Relax, Ed," he said, fingers massaging Ed's hip. Ed did relax then, by some miracle.

Roy's grip on Ed's cock tightened but not enough to be painful and when he dragged his hand back down his fingers brushed against Ed's balls. Ed cursed and squirmed and tried to press down into that because it felt really fucking good. Mustang was chuckling again but Ed didn't have time to get pissed about it because lips were on the head of his dick and fingers were gently fondling his balls. He felt like he was going to burst.

His tongue licked while his mouth sucked but didn't lower and obscenities were pouring from Ed's mouth. His thumb rubbed circles on Ed's balls as he brought his mouth a little lower before pulling back up and sucking hard.

Ed was able to buck his hips a bit (_Finally!_) but Roy adjusted for it, moving downward again once Ed was settled as well as giving his balls a gentle squeeze. One of Ed's hands was tangled in Roy's hair while the other grabbed at the sheets and he was so damn close now that he felt like he was going to explode.

So of course he did the only rational thing he could think of when Roy removed his mouth and tried to stand up: he kicked him on the back of the head with his automail foot.

Roy rubbed his head and growled. "Keep that to yourself or the only thing you'll be fucking tonight is your hand."

He stood and went to the night stand, (Ed was now keeping quiet because he didn't feel like jerking it tonight) grabbing a small jar Ed had not noticed was there before. The cap was unscrewed and Roy's fingers dipped into it and then came out glistening. His mouth was back after that (_Thank fuck!_) and now his fingers were moving below Ed's balls, down to circle and caress around the tight ring. Ed swallowed hard.

The mouth on his dick was a wonderful distraction but it didn't completely drive away the nervousness. He was here, in Roy's bed, with Roy's mouth on him, and Roy's fingers were doing... things. This was what he wanted wasn't it? Ever since he'd begun hearing the rumors about a certain Colonel and his skills in the bedroom, he'd been curious and had even thought a time or two about broaching the subject. Of course, his search and that whole grand quest had kept him from ever doing that but he had determined that once all of that was over and things had time to settle he was going for it and he did.

Now, he was lying here, heart pounding hard while Roy touched and tasted him and he'd be lying if he said he wasn't scared (but only a little). It wasn't like he'd ever had time for anything sexual besides the casual courtship with his left hand so he was all new to this. He knew how guys had sex with each other but he only knew of it in theory and not in actual practice. Ed remembered hearing somewhere that it could hurt and while he didn't think Roy would intentionally hurt him it still gave him this gnawing feeling in his gut.

Roy seemed to sense something was up, whether by the tensing of Ed's body or the silence, and removed his mouth, glancing up at Ed from between his thighs. "Are you okay?"

Ed licked his lips and drew in a shaky breath. "I'm fine. I just... it's not like I've done this before and it's all so..." Ed said, gesturing around vaguely with his hands because he couldn't exactly put what he was thinking into words.

Roy gave him a look that said he understood and one of his hands, the one that wasn't down by his ass, rubbed soothing circles on his hip. "Just relax. It might hurt a little at first but I promise it won't the whole time."

Ed took a moment and a few deep breaths and his body finally relaxed. Roy was still staring up at him and Ed looked down and nodded after a moment.

It was a lot easier to relax when Roy was still massaging his hip when his mouth went back and his finger went into the cleft of his ass. It was a comfort to him for some strange reason.

Roy's finger that had resumed it's caressing was slick and just as Ed felt a pressure there Roy took him in to the back of his throat and Ed didn't feel the finger gently slide in because Roy was fucking _swallowing _him. He came back up, licking at the head of Ed's cock and then Ed did feel the finger in him and it felt really weird but there was something about it that felt good too.

It felt even better when Roy moved it. "Holy fucking shit!" he shouted out to the ceiling, abusing the sheets as his eyes went owlish. He felt the vibrations of a chuckle from Roy's mouth and he would have glared down at him but he was too busy panting. Whatever he did, Ed wanted him to do it again. _A lot._

The finger inside of him was moving steadily and now there was more pressure, a second pressing in and it burned and he hissed but then gave Roy a reassuring grin. Sweat was beading all over his skin and his breathing was labored as the fingers moved and stretched and it did hurt a bit but it also felt wonderful so Ed guessed he'd let the bastard keep doing it. This went on for a little while longer, Ed getting a delightful fingering and blowjob that made him feel like his balls were going to explode.

Roy pulled out of him and off of him and Ed did some akin to a whine but Roy just smiled at him and went for the jar again. After coating his fingers in... whatever the hell was in that jar Ed watched as Roy reached down and gave himself one sure, slow stroke and groaned. Ed's eyes were wide and he couldn't tear them away. He swore to fuck if Mustang jacked off in front of him he would personally see to it that he got a shit ton of automail shoved up his ass, express delivery from one Edward Elric.

Lucky for Roy and Roy's ass, he stopped after coating himself and leaned over Ed, pushing his legs apart before settling between them. Ed had to take a deep breath then because he could feel Roy pressing against him but not breaching him, like he was waiting. Ed looked up at him and he guessed Roy could see some of the tendrils of nervousness that had crawled back on to his face because his hand was massaging Ed's hip again. Why the hell was that so comforting?

"Is it okay?"

Ed stared up at him for a little longer in silence then nodded, forcing himself to relax. Both of Roy's hand were on his hips now and he started pressing in. Okay, this burned a lot more than fingers. He winced and Roy must have seen it because he stopped, even though, Ed noticed, he looked like he didn't want to stop.

"Shit, sorry," Ed said, pressing a hand to his face. "I'm just fucking terrible at this shit, aren't I?"

Roy chuckled and Ed moved his hand and frowned up at him. "You're fine. Just stay relaxed. I'll start slow, okay?"

Ed nodded, closing his eyes and Roy continued to press inside of him. He was trying his hardest not to let the pain show on his face but it did hurt and from everything he'd heard about sex was that it was supposed to feel good. When did this start feeling better?

Roy was still for a little bit after he became fully sheathed within Ed. Ed opened his eyes again and looked up at him. He was sweaty (which was hot), he looked like he was trying not to just fuck the shit out of him (which was also hot), but he was waiting for Ed to adjust. (Fuck, everything about him was pretty hot).

After what felt like nearly an eternity to Ed, Roy started moving, slowly drawing himself out, save for the head, then pushing back in. Ed groaned long and loud. Okay, that hurt but it also felt fucking _amazing_. He kept on like this, the pace maddeningly slow, the only sound in the room being Ed's low growls.

There was heat, pooling in his stomach then spreading. This was far beyond what he had imagined and as his moans started turning to whines, Roy did the most amazing thing and went faster. Ed was clutching the sheets like his life depended on it and holy shit if he kept doing that he was going to explode.

"F-fuck," he said, licking his lips, "Shit, goddamn, Roy!"

The sounds spilling from his mouth were picking up in volume and intensity. He wanted more, he wanted it deeper and faster and harder and he wanted it _now. _Ed's legs came up and wrapped around Roy and that just pulled him deeper and Ed shouted out a very loud "Ah, fuck!" and Roy was making noises now too. That should be weird but it wasn't and it was only driving Ed further over the edge, making the heat more intense.

Roy was grunting now and it seemed his control was slipping because his movements were getting more erratic and jerky but Ed didn't care because it was the most wonderful thing in the world right now. His legs tightened around Roy and he didn't think it was possible but that just made him move even faster and even harder. Ed was getting loud enough now that he was sure the neighbors could probably hear him shouting profanity at the top of his lungs.

He had thought it couldn't get better, the heat consuming him and wrapping around him as every nerve was on edge, firing off at full power. It wasn't until a calloused hand found his bobbing erection and started stroking that Ed found out that he was wrong.

Anything he shouted after that point was unintelligible and he was clawing at the sheets and Roy was husking his name in his ear.

It was all too much and Ed just screamed at the top of his lungs as he felt the hot splash of semen on his stomach and then inside of him. The two of them collapsed to the bed, Roy having pulled out with the action.

_Holy fucking shit._

Ed was panting, eyes wide as they stared off at the ceiling. His chest heaved and he was covered in sweat and his own ejaculate but he didn't give two shits. He turned to look at Roy, who looked just as exhausted and pleased as Ed himself felt.

Ed grinned. "That... that was fucking awesome and we better be doing that again some time soon because if we don't I'm going to kick your ass."

Roy managed a quiet chuckle. "Well, how can I say no when you've put it so eloquently?"

Ed shoved his shoulder but there was no malice in the action. "Don't be a dick. Where am I sleeping?"

Roy just stared at him like he'd somehow sprouted a third arm from his chest. "I wasn't aware you were staying over."

"I wasn't going to but I don't think I can walk back to the hotel right now." Ed yawned, eyes half lidded with exhaustion. That had been one hell of a work out and he was damn ready to sleep it off. "Fuck it, I'll just sleep in your bed."

Roy snorted. "Yes, Ed you can sleep in my bed. I don't mind at all."

Ed grinned and shoved his shoulder again. "Stop bitching and move over."

Roy did, going to one side of the bed and allowing Ed to take the other before throwing a thick comforter over the two of them. Ed laid facing Roy, blinking sleepily. "G'night," he whispered. It was pretty easy to sleep that night.


	2. Chapter 2

Ed woke that morning to an empty bed and a note on the nightstand. Damn bastard had just fucked him, slept, and left? Whatever. He'd gotten what he'd wanted. Even though his body ached, he sat up and picked up the note.

_Ed,_

_I apologize for leaving you with nothing more than a quickly written note but life is what it is and I have to work._

_Last night was... in no uncertain terms, it was absolutely brilliant. You were always a prodigy and that holds for your sexual proficiency as well._

_You are welcome to stay if you like but I won't think any less of you if you don't. There's food in the icebox and a spare set of clothes for you (though they may not fit you)._

_If ever you decide you need another experience, don't hesitate to ask._

_Roy_

Ed frowned at the note. Stay? What the hell would he stay for? He'd come here looking for sex and he'd gotten just that. He saw no point in hanging around. It wasn't like he thought Mustang was a bad guy or something but this had just been a curiosity of his and he'd satisfied it. Best to just leave it at that and get going.

He looked back down at the paper in his hand and just underneath Roy's name was a phone number. Damn, his ego was bigger than Ed thought. He tossed the note on the bed, stood, and stretched. Well, he was already here and there was no reason he should go back to the hotel smelling like sex. The bastard had pretty much given him free reign of the house so he figured using the bath was no harm.

Ed bathed, ate, and dressed then stood in the bedroom giving the note a sour look. He could take it and just not call but then maybe that was rude. But if he took it then that would just make Mustang unbearable if he ever saw him again and it wasn't like his ego needed the boost. Ah, what the fuck did he care? He snatched up the note and stuffed it in his pocket, still frowning as he went downstairs.

Should he leave a note too? No, that would be stupid and that would just feed his ego and wouldn't Mustang just _love _to torture him with that? Was it rude to leave someone's house after you fucked them without leaving a note? Damn, he wished he had some references but his experience with these things had always been painfully limited. Maybe there was something at the library about what one did after the doing.

He left him a note despite his internal debate.

_Hey bastard,_

_Your damn ego is big enough as it is so I'm going back to the hotel. If it inflates anymore your head will be too big to get through the door._

_I ate your food and used your bath so you have something to bitch about later. You're welcome._

_Oh and nice try with the short joke, asshole. Ha ha ha. I can wear my own clothes, thanks!_

_Ed_

–

Ed stood, hand over the receiver but didn't move. Was this gonna make him look like some desperate woman? He'd be damned if he was gonna act like one of Mustang's women! Fuck this shit, he didn't need this. He drew his hand away from the receiver, growling as he went and flopped down on the couch.

He stared up at the ceiling, glaring so hard that, if it could have, the paint would have peeled from the heat of it. Why did the fucking asshole have to do this to him? Here he was, Edward Elric, the Fullmetal Alchemist and hero of the people, torn on whether or not to call Roy Mustang. The fucker did this on purpose and he was probably laughing his ass off and that just made Ed angrier. He slammed a fist against the back of the couch and growled. Fuck this. He wasn't a coward and he had proved that a week ago in Mustang's bed.

Ed practically flung himself from the couch and grabbed the phone, dialing before he had a chance to stop himself. It only took two rings before the call was answered.

"Hello?"

"Hey Al." Maybe he was more of a coward than he thought. "I have a problem," he said, pushing forward before his brother could so much as utter another word.

Al sighed. "You know, I always thought you'd be less trouble without the alchemy but I see now that you just naturally attract disaster."

Ed frowned, even if Al couldn't see it. "Don't be such an ass."

"Sorry, sorry," Al said, laughing a bit. "What's this problem?"

Ed went silent, feeling like something was caught in his throat. "How's everything in Resembool?"

"You're stalling, brother," Al said and Ed could almost see the smug look on the little shit's face.

"I am not stalling!" Ed said, waving his free arm around. "Can't a guy just call his little brother and ask how he's doing without said little brother making assumptions? You're almost as bad as the General!"

"So this is a problem with the General then?"

"What?! No! I mean, yes! I mean-" Ed scrubbed a hand over his face. "You're too fucking perceptive."

"I have to be," he said and Ed felt his eyebrow twitch when Al laughed a little. "My older brother has a skull harder than steel."

Ed went quiet again because he didn't call Al to get into an argument with him even if he was being a smart ass. "Do you remember that thing we talked about?"

"I am assuming you are referring to the conversation about you, the General, and you wanting to jump his bones."

"Jump his bones?!" Ed shouted and his arm was waving around in a frantic pattern again. "Where did you learn to talk like that?!"

"I blame all of my bad habits on you. You were a terrible influence," Al said and Ed could practically hear him grinning.

Ed growled into the receiver. "Shut up for a second and listen. So, I went and did the thing we talked about and it was pretty awesome but he gave me his number and I don't know if I should call him or what. Would that be weird or am I just being stupid again or is he being an asshole and trying to bait me?"

It was Al's turn to go silent and Ed held the receiver tighter in his hand. If it was still metal it probably would have crushed the phone by that point.

"What would be weird about it, brother? Do you want to call him?"

"I don't know!" he shouted in exasperation. "Maybe this was all a really bad idea and I shouldn't have done it and fuck, he probably thinks this shit is so goddamn funny!"

"Don't say that, brother. As much as you might deny it, you needed this. You spent all of those years ignoring yourself because you wanted to do so much for so many people. It's about time you started thinking more of yourself because you deserve it, Ed. I can't think of anyone who deserves it more." 

Ed swallowed hard and rubbed his eyes with the back of his hand. "You are the best little brother in the whole fucking world and if anyone says different I'll kick their ass."

Al smiled. "I wouldn't have it any other way, Ed. Now stop freaking out and call him."

Ed nodded, still wiping his eyes as he hung up. Al was right and Ed owed him big time.

–

So he'd called and Mustang hadn't sounded smug or anything like that. He'd sounded _happy. _Ed had thought it was just because it meant he could do obscene things to him again but the more he thought about it, that answer seemed pretty damn far from the truth. If he wasn't happy about that then what was he so happy about? None of this shit made sense.

Ed had gone over and they'd done some amazing things and he'd twisted in ways he didn't even think he could. It was great and wonderful and Mustang still wasn't smug about any of it. It was weird because he was smug about _everything _so why wasn't he smug about this? It was unsettling and made Ed think about the things Mustang did that didn't include a bed or a little jar on a nightstand.

He'd go over there and every single time, Roy would feed him, which was always a great way to start the night. Then, they would go up to the room and do the obvious things that people did together in a bed. They'd either fall asleep right after or Ed would go take a bath and then Roy would be there rubbing his shoulders (which was fucking heaven). In the morning, he'd feed Ed again (if he didn't have work) and they would sit there and talk about all kinds of things: alchemy, other sciences, Al, the office, and whatever other shit they could think to talk about.

Roy was nice to him and would do all of these little things for him and that made him uneasy. It wasn't that he didn't enjoy all of the little things because he did, _very _much. He had wondered at one point if it was some way to keep Ed coming back to his bed but he'd dismissed that almost instantly. He didn't have to do all the little stuff to get Ed back underneath him (even if it was nice). That still left him wondering why.

By this point, it had been three weeks since he and Roy had begun their... whatever this was. Sexual relationship? Whatever it was, it had been good enough in the beginning that Ed kept coming back and would even stay over for days at a time and then it kept getting better. Ed had to conclude that the rumors he had been hearing since he was fifteen were wrong. They didn't even come close to describing the brilliance of sex with Roy Mustang.

Ed lay on his stomach, completely naked, watching Roy as he went through his morning routine. He showered, he shaved, he messed with his hair (Ed rolled his eyes), he got dressed, and he messed with his hair some more. It was odd how comfortable this all was, Ed naked on Roy Mustang's bed while Roy got ready for work and glanced at him in passing (which just made Ed grin). He was enjoying his time here more and more with each passing day, not just because the sex was fucking awesome. There was something else that kept drawing him back here but he couldn't figure out just what that was.

"I want to take you out to dinner tonight."

Ed scowled up at him, head resting in the palm of his right hand. "Why?"

"Because I want to take you out to dinner," he said, eyes trailing to Ed's ass for a moment.

"Y'know, if this is all some plot to get in my pants it's a little late," Ed said with a grin, sticking his ass in the air and wiggling it.

Roy snorted. "I didn't need to plot. You were handing it to me on a silver platter," he said and then walked over and smacked Ed on the ass.

He jumped and yelped. That _asshole_! "Hey!"

Roy grinned and Ed wanted to smack that damn smile off of his face. "As I was saying, I want to take you out to dinner. So go back to the hotel and get ready and I'll come pick you up after work."

Ed was laying on his back now, his head hanging off of the edge of the bed. "I'm not gonna argue. Free food," he said, grinning again.

"You're so charming," he said, tone flat. "I should get going. Be ready by eight."

Ed flipped over and sat up on the bed just before Roy came over and leaned down, stopping just inches from his face. Something in the look he gave Ed made his throat feel tight and his chest jump. What the hell? His hand sank into Ed's hair and tipped his head back and Roy kissed him. Ed's chest did that funny little jumping again because this wasn't like all those other times they kissed.  
Their usual kisses were a mash of lips and clash of teeth and tongues. They'd both fight to dominate and they were messy and they were great. This was soft, almost feather light on his lips and it was making his chest expand and making it feel warm. It was brief but it left Ed confused and red.

Roy left after that with a quiet goodbye and Ed just stared after him, at a loss for words. His heart was pounding hard against his ribs as his hands clenched in the sheets.

_What the hell?_

–

Ed's mind seemed to have left him after that. The rest of the day he was in a sort of daze and he went about getting ready without thinking about anything any longer than he had to. That was, until there was nothing left to do and he was just on the couch in the hotel room waiting.

That kiss... he was so fucking confused because they _never _kissed like that. Roy had never looked at him like that and then just kissed him for the sake of kissing him because their kissing had always preceded sex. That one had just been left hanging as Roy walked out of the door and Ed was having a hard time figuring out what it meant.

He didn't have enough time to think on it and come to an answer because Roy was there and then they were in the car on the way to some unknown location. The silence was unsettling and Roy kept glancing over at him and Ed didn't know why but that made his face heat up and his stomach clench.

"Is everything alright?"

His voice seemed loud as it cut through the quiet. "Yeah." Just act normal, Ed. You can do this. Why are you acting like an idiot now of all times? He's seen you naked! He shouldn't make you nervous. "Where are we going?" he asked, trying for something at least close to normal conversation.

"A bistro in the more rural part of the city. It's a small, quiet place. I'm sure you'll enjoy it."

Ed nodded and the silence came back to rear it's ugly head again. Why was Roy taking him out to dinner? Couldn't he just feed him at the house? Ed's mind was going in at least a thousand different directions as the car came to a stop in front of a little building.

Soft candlelight flickered within and it made the entire place glow with warmth. It looked inviting and comfortable and not at all how he'd imagined. He'd wondered what sort of place Roy would dine in and for some reason he'd always pictured him in some upscale restaurant, with the kind of food that cost a fortune and you only got enough to nibble on. This place looked cozy and relaxed.

They were still silent as they went inside and for Ed it was because he was busy taking the place in. It sort of reminded him of home in a way, reminded him of when he and Al were kids and when they had stayed with Granny and Winry before leaving with their teacher. They'd sit around the small table and eat stew and at the end of the nights when Ed and Al didn't leave to study, Granny would extinguish the lamps and Ed and Al would curl up under blankets on the floor. It wasn't always the most comfortable place to sleep but there was family there and not this big, empty house with just the two of them in it.

Ed had to steer his thoughts in another direction as they sat at a small table. It wouldn't do to start thinking of that time again. It was still just as painful as when it had happened and though he no longer held heavily to his past, he knew the wounds would never fully heal.

"You're being awfully quiet tonight, Ed."

Ed sighed, running a hand over his face. "Shit, sorry, I'm just... why'd you wanna take me to a restaurant?"

Roy smiled and Ed had to force his cheeks not to burn. "Is it so bad that I wanted to spend time with you outside of my bed?"

Ed hated his face because he was blushing even though he told it not to. "No, it's just kind of weird I guess."

Roy was chuckling and he always seemed to do that when Ed felt like a complete moron.

"What's so damn funny?"

"Nothing, Ed. This is just so... you."

Ed eyed him like he was insane. "What the hell does that mean?"

He was still smiling at him and Ed felt that weird flutter in his chest that had been happening a lot today. He wished it would stop because it was getting really fucking annoying. Ed decided to use his menu to hide his flaming face and soon he was frowning at it. What the fuck language was this?

"It's Cretan, Ed."

Ed lowered the menu and raised an eyebrow at him. "How the hell am I supposed to order if I don't know what it says?"

Roy laughed and Ed felt his eyebrow twitch, his fist just itching to hit Roy square in the nose.

"Let me help you," he said, leaning over to point out something on the menu. "Try this. I'm sure you'll enjoy it."

Ed swallowed hard and tried to focus on the menu and not the long finger (he knows those fingers now, has become well acquainted with them) pressed to the glossy menu and pointing at something he doesn't even know how to pronounce. "It better not be some weird ass shit," he said.

Roy just laughed, light and joyful, a laugh Ed is not used to hearing. "I assure you it is not 'some weird ass shit'," Roy said, glancing at his menu one last time before folding it and leaving it on the table.

It was indeed not some weird ass shit. Roy must know his Cretan because he ordered Ed steak and fries. Fucking _steak. _If he wasn't already fucking him this would definitely seal the deal. Roy and Ed ate and Ed was glad to have food in front of him because these awkward ass silences were uncomfortable.

Despite the awesome steak dinner in front of him, Ed's mind still rolled over everything that had been nagging at his mind all day. Why in the world were they in a bistro, eating dinner together like they were dating or something? And why did that thought make his stomach flutter again? Today was just weird. No other way around it.

After they ate, Ed somehow managed some conversation with Roy and even found himself just forgetting the strange day he'd been having. He was absorbed in their talking and he didn't even notice when Roy had asked for the check until he stood up. Ed followed and they left the restaurant. Ed noticed that every now and then, Roy would look to Ed with this soft little smile that made his chest tighten and then just turn back to the road and drive like it'd never even happened. What was that for?

Ed was determined to not let it get in the way of tonight though. He'd think about it later and lament over it then because he was too busy with Roy having pinned him to the wall and Roy's lips leaving a searing path over his neck. Sex was a great way to wipe the mind of all thought, rational and otherwise.

So he let his mind be emptied and when they were sweaty and sated and the sheets were suitably messy Ed settled against Roy's side in the bed. Roy gave him another one of those soft smiles that made his chest and stomach feel like they had wings while his eyelids drooped from sleep not being far behind. He was kind of... nice like that, all relaxed with his hair messed up and his eyes kind of glossed over and Ed wondered why he'd never noticed that before.

Ed closed his eyes and for a while, just listened to Roy's even breathing in the otherwise silent room. He wasn't sure how long he'd just been laying in the dark like that but he was very nearly asleep when he felt Roy shift. His lips were near Ed's ear and he was obviously sleeping but his breath puffing out over Ed's skin still made his body heat up. Roy draped an arm over him and settled closer and just when Ed thought he was good to go and done moving around, Ed froze.

"I love you," Roy said, not much more than a whisper and he wasn't awake, Ed told himself. He was just sleeping and talking in his sleep and fuck, Ed's stomach felt like it was tied in knots.

He was so fucked.

–

Ed had trouble sleeping properly that night, just those three words in that voice repeating in his mind keeping him from a restful sleep.

Ed didn't really do feelings. Okay, so that wasn't entirely true. He did if they were anger or guilt or shame. Never love or sadness or anything else normal people felt on a regular basis. Ed got mad, punched things and people, stewed in his own self-loathing and the closest he ever got to love was with Alphonse but that was all platonic.

Ed really doubted Roy felt anything platonic toward him.

That morning, Ed slid out of bed, careful not to make enough noise to wake Roy and got dressed, tied his hair up, then went to the den. He pulled out pen and paper and wrote a quick note.

_Mustang,_

_Had to go. Got some shit to do._

_Ed_

It was a lie and he knew but he felt like he was suffocating right now and he just needed some damn air and some time to think. Maybe it had just been sleep talk but he'd learned long ago that the mind was a strange thing. It had flung all his past mistakes at him for nearly five long years in the form of twisted dreams and each time he fucked up some more, something was added to nightmares. That wasn't just weird dreams or his sleeping mind cooking up things it normally wouldn't.

Did that mean Mustang wasn't just saying weird shit in his sleep? And if he did mean it then what the fuck was Ed supposed to do?

People didn't love him, at least not romantically. Not Edward Elric, the greatest fuck up since Van Hohenheim. To everyone around him he was just that kid with a bad temper, a foul mouth, and who punched first and asked questions later. He was brash and acted without thinking and (his _favorite_) a smart mouthed little asshole who needed to learn his place before someone taught it to him. He was damaged and broken and fucked up and why would anyone love him?

And what about Mustang? Ed knew he was nice and he smelled good and he was a fucking amazing lay. What else? Ed thought about it for a moment. He knew that the man enjoyed fine drinks, like brandy and scotch and he knew that he read the newspaper like that thing was scripture to him. He knew that Roy always purposely left his hair messed up just so it looked like it did that on its own. Ed knew that when he smiled, when he really smiled and wasn't wearing all the masks, it went to his eyes and he looked really good like that.

Good. He knew Roy was good, probably one of the best men this country had seen. He had his own demons, so many people did these days, but he was still willing to face them just to right the wrongs he'd done. He wanted to fix this country, make it better. He knew Roy had actually given a shit about them, even if they argued constantly and Roy was a smug ass, and wanted to them whole again. He knew Roy had put his own ass on the line just to make sure they got information they needed. He was a good man and he cared about people even if he didn't have to because he could.

What Ed didn't know was when he'd gone from being Mustang to just being Roy.

Ed didn't call, didn't show up on Ro- Mustang's door step, didn't leave his hotel room for three days. He didn't do feelings and sorting through all of it was hurting his head and he was going in circles trying to figure all of this shit out. He talked to Al and Al said he was being an idiot and Al said it was pretty obvious what Ed needed to do but he didn't actually _tell_ Ed so Al was no help at all.

Fine. He'd have to figure this out himself then. What was he trying to figure out? Why Roy said he loved him or how he felt about it? Now that he thought about it, he wasn't so sure. How he felt about it...

Other people's feelings were alien enough but he was clueless to understand his own most of the time. Was he angry? No. If he was pissed he would have just yelled at the bastard and maybe punched him. Was he sad? Definitely not. Confused? Very much so. Fuck, this was all so hard to figure out.

Without going to Mustang's place, Ed just laid around his hotel room, listening to the ceiling fan click as it spun and he read books some times. He hated being bored and right now he was definitely bored. What would he normally do? Go to Mustang's and lay around there all day. Then right now should not be so damn boring because he was doing the same damn thing.

Ed rubbed a hand over his face and before he could really contemplate much more the phone rang. Shit. It might the bastard calling... but it might be Alphonse calling. Great. He listened to it ring and fought with himself over whether or not to pick it up. Damn it. He stood from the couch and walked to the phone, taking the receiver in his hand.

"Hello?"

"Hello, Edward."

Aw crap.

"Yo."

There was silence on the line for a moment and Ed thought maybe Roy had hung up on him.

"Is something wrong, Ed?"

"No," he said and he hated himself because even he thought it sounded like a lie.

"You haven't been by in a while."

"Just been busy. Had stuff do."

There was more silence and his throat felt like it had a lump stuck in it that he couldn't get out. Lying to him about this just somehow felt wrong.

"I suppose I won't keep you then," Roy said.

"Wait."

"What is it?"

"Never mind. It's nothing," Ed said.

The silence dragged on again and Ed was learning to hate silences because they could be heavy even though they weren't technically tangible. They could be full of unspoken words and weird feelings and just so much.

Roy said his goodbyes then hung up the phone and Ed didn't feel any better. He felt worse and even more confused. He could talk to him just fine a few days ago and then Roy kissed him like that, like he meant something and it seemed to turn Ed's brain to mush. It was just a damn kiss so why... he knew why. He knew exactly why and he was too afraid to admit it even to himself.

All he'd thought he'd wanted was to finally put his curiosity to rest but then why keep going back? He had kept going back and he'd spent days in a row there and even now he still felt the pull, like he was being called to Roy's side.

It finally hit him. Three goddamn days and he hadn't even considered the slightest possibility of that. Three long, stupid, boring days and all he had done was sat here like an idiot and Roy didn't even know why.

Ed grabbed the phone and punched in the number and when it was picked up he just pushed forward before Roy could even get a single world in.

"Okay, so, I think I might be in love with you and I just spent three fucking days sitting on my ass because I'm an idiot and I didn't even fucking call or anything. You don't deserve that kind of shit though and I should have at least said something but I was confused and now I'm not so confused anymore."

His chest tightened painfully when all he heard for a few moments was the quiet. He opened his mouth to speak but Roy beat him to it.

"I'm coming to get you."

"What? Wait a second!"

Too late. The line went dead and Ed was left staring at the receiver in his hand for a few seconds before setting it down. Okay, so he was coming over. Ed stood in front of the phone for a bit longer before he moved to the couch and sat down to wait. It didn't take long.

Ed sat for a few moments as Roy knocked at the door and his brain yelled at him to go answer. Why was he still sitting here? He stood up from the couch and walked to the door. He'd barely gotten it open when arms wrapped around him and lips pressed to his and no matter what Roy might have thought, he did not yelp or squeak. He laid his hands on Roy's chest and pushed him back a bit to look up at him.

"What the hell are you doing?"

"For a genius," Roy said, "you are rather slow at times."

Ed felt his cheeks flush but this time in annoyance. "Your pick up lines are getting shittier every day, bastard."

Roy brought his head forward, pressing his forehead to Ed's and with the closeness Ed can't breathe.

"You were agonizing over this for three days weren't you?"

"Agonizing? I don't fucking agonize over shit!"

Roy smiled. "Yes you do. When you can't seem to understand something you sit and stew and won't let it go until you figure out. What brought all of this on?"

Ed looked for a way to say this that wouldn't be embarrassing and fails. "You, last time I was over and we had just had sex and you fell asleep and you said..." This should not be so damn hard. "You said you loved me but you were sleeping so I didn't know if it was just sleep talk or if you meant it and I got confused so I just sort of left."

Roy laughed, laughed for a good few minutes while Ed looked at him as if he were insane. "I did mean it and I still mean it. I love you, Ed."

Those words set off a chain reaction. Ed kicked the door closed then grabbed Roy by the collar of his shirt and hauled him down. It was almost as if Ed was trying to just devour him, his teeth scraping at Roy's lower lip while his tongue tasted him. The two of them just kissed like their lives depended on it for a few minutes before breaking apart, breathless and wanting.

"So," Ed said, licking his lips, "now what?"

"Now," Roy said, hands moving up and down Ed's arms, "you come home with me and I make love to you and talk you in to moving in with me because I don't think I can do a long distance relationship and you can't stay in this hotel forever."

Ed shrugged and grinned. "We can figure something out."

"Indeed we can," Roy said and Ed thought about calling Alphonse because he would definitely want to hear about this.


End file.
